Napoleonic Wargame Club (NWC)

Smarting from a major defeat at the hands of that dastardly Frenchman Clint Matthews, I know the only way I can show my face in the tavern again is to return to the battlefield, gird my loins, and march bravely towards the sounds of gun fire. Frenchman, Italians, Swiss, Elbians, Zulus; come one, come all unto the fields of glory! As always, I am open to other scenarios if that one does not tickle your fancy. And to be clear, I am not going anywhere near your fancy.

My command post is currently located at nh260 at msn dot com, a modest room over the tailor's store, not far from the Rhine Tavern. My servant and confidant, Maria, will receive any dispatches, should they be sent.

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Major General Richard Bradshaw, 1st Viscount of Manchester

Lloyd's Battery, Royal Artillery
Royal Regiment of Artillery
Reserve Artillery & Engineers

I encourage Richard, defeat always learn, I pity the next French enemy who is attacking you, you will pay the broken dishes.

Long live the Spanish Brigade!.

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General de Brigada Jose Angel "Trane" Barredo.
Comandante de la Brigada Española.

A dispatch has arrived from the sons of the revolution, soiled paper and many spelling errors are the hallmarks of a French correspondence. As soon as the preliminaries are complete the sound of gunfire will once again command my attention until the Glory of Spain rises above the smoke and bathes the world in brilliance!

Viva Espana!!!

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Major General Richard Bradshaw, 1st Viscount of Manchester

Lloyd's Battery, Royal Artillery
Royal Regiment of Artillery
Reserve Artillery & Engineers

I assure you that the message was not actually written by a Frenchman, Major Bradshaw, for not only are they universally illiterate, the imposition of the Continental System has deprived them of the quills, ink, and parchment needed to undertake such a correspondence. They communicate with one another through gutteral grunts and the occassional garlic infused flatulants that are a natural side effect of their mollusk laden diets.

No, good sir, most likely they coerced a noble peasant to draft the missive on their behalf. It is doubtful that any of them actually knows what it even says, but by all means use the dispatch as an excuse to engage them on the field of battle and teach them the error of their thieving, dissident ways.

Thieving, thieving, I'll have you know us Frenchmen do no not thieve we just liberate what belongs to you for ourselves, that is the revolutionary way.

What is ours is ours and what is yours is ours.

Spoken like a true thief. Unfortunately for you, what is ours only becomes yours when you can actually take it from us. You Brigands of France fare quit well against unarmed women and children, but as soon as you hear the faintest skirl of our bagpipes, or our drummers beating 'The March of the Grenadiers', you soil your fancy undergarments and seek immediate refuge in the nearest sewer drain that you can find, knowing that the Gentlemen Officers of the Mighty Anglo-Allied Army would not debase themselves to follow you into the natural habitat from which you were spawned.

Now let me see if my memory serves me well but am I right that in the Peninsular the Spanish people hated the English only slightly less than the French who I may add were only our Allies a few years before. May I draw your mind back to the Slaughter at Ciudad Rodrigo where hundreds of town folk were butchered and the debacle at Badajoz and the aftermath of Victoria. Seems we French are not the only ones who seemed to take our fight to the innocent Sir.

But fear not we can deal with your "Bagpiping Amazons" any day, in fact we will send them back to hell on the end of our bayonets. As for your Guards we will let the Elite of the Elite deal with them and they will swat them like flies and stamp on them just to be sure they are not going to rise again.

That is how a Frenchmen fights Sir.

France lost.

Salute!

France lost the more bizarre words truly have never been spoken.

Surely if this were the case there would be no point to taking up the digital sword and leading digital troops forwards into the digital fray.

Or, if there remains some point to doing so despite the foul words just uttered, such point must be that it matters not what happened in this other reality of which you speak, for we are in this one and here the fight is waged every day, with victory and defeat given and taken... without end in sight.

But surely there can be no admixture of two diametrically opposed realities, for that would spell chaos and unwind the very fabric that holds this particular string of theory together.

Maybe it was the jaeger-liquor that makes one speak so...

Regards,

yes.......and the South lost........the Jap's and Nazi's lost too.

yet we still play on.........

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C.N.Matthews

My noble, verbal adversary transitioned his argument into a historical context. I simply did the same. There was no measure of Jagermeister at fault. It was a simple statement of historical fact...France lost.

I might suggest that if you 'make believe' Frenchies want to stand some chance of winning an argument against this 'make believe' Hanoverian, that you dillengently avoid the actual, historical facts, because if you fail to do so, France will lose every single time.

Now, as for Clint's implication that the Confederacy actually was defeated in the War of Northern Aggression, I would have to disagree. We were never defeated...

...we uns is jest restin'!

you got me there..........I have to agree!

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C.N.Matthews

If you have not yet found an opponent for your game, I will happily accept your challenge!

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Général de Brigade William Reaves
51ème Régiment d'Infanterie de Ligne
2ème Brigade
1ère Division
5éme Corps d'Armée
La Grande Armée

I am confident that the courier, if not an enlightened Frenchman, one of their allies. Maria, my trusted confidant, informed me that he was unkempt, smelled of bad cooking, and took the lace doily that was under the small frame containing the portrait of her dearly departed mother. In addition, there were empty mollusk shells on the stairs and reports of a missing goat from the shed next door. So we have the thieving and illiterate.

So we will assemble our cyber battalions, sharpen our pixel bayonets, and form up our 3D cavalry. The end result should be similar so I have commissioned a Sim City Elba Island for Monsieur Bonaparte and his gaggle of camembert cheese loving lackeys!

Alas, one of your side, Mark Oakford, has taken up my gauntlet, slapped me on the back of the head with it.

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Major General Richard Bradshaw, 1st Viscount of Manchester

Lloyd's Battery, Royal Artillery
Royal Regiment of Artillery
Reserve Artillery & Engineers

Salute!

MC Jones1810 wrote:

Now, as for Clint's implication that the Confederacy actually was defeated in the War of Northern Aggression, I would have to disagree. We were never defeated... :shock:

...we uns is jest restin'!

That would be resting at Appomattox Courthouse in Virginia...

Just re-read the Bruce Catton book, A Stillness at Appomattox.
Good series of books on the Civil War, I've always thought.

Regards,