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Miss Use of Pumpkins http://www.wargame.ch/board/acwgc/viewtopic.php?f=131&t=15884 |
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Author: | cameronm [ Thu Nov 18, 2010 2:27 am ] |
Post subject: | Miss Use of Pumpkins |
Gentlemen is has come to my attention that members of my Command were firing pumpkins (not at yanks) from gun tubes over the Halloween period. This is the miss use of Confederate property and it must stop. The firing of any form of fruit or vege from a gun tube is not permitted, unless it is at the enemy. My CoA, Colonel Stiles, is currently undertaking a full investigation and he will not rest until he has found the offenders - so surrender now. I know this type of thing goes on in the AoG, but that is no excuse. |
Author: | Blake [ Thu Nov 18, 2010 4:12 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Miss Use of Pumpkins |
The Pumpkins were contraband and we were simply following orders to destroy all captured enemy supplies! I am proud to report we destroyed over 50,000 enemy Pumpkins at a cost of only one man wounded in action. Apparently some boys from the 9th Alabama got a little drunk and decided to tie a rope around the largest Pumpkin and then around Pvt. Buckhalter. Buckhalter, not a small man at all, bet he could hold the Pumpkin down once it was fired from the cannon. All of Bonferroni's Division was in on the betting and some 15,000 Yankee Greenbacks were betting on the affair. The cannon fired and the Pumpkin was launched with the rope tied securely around Buckhalter's chest. Buckhalter had cleverly positioned himself near a large tree which would take the brunt of the force off of Buckhalter when the rope struck the tree and caused the Pumpkin to be slingshotted back towards Buckhalter without him having to do much. I imagine it was about the time the rope hit the tree and the Pumpkin was hurling straight at Buckhalter he realized the folly of his plan. Although I didnt see the event I could hear the impact of the Pumpkin hitting Buckhalter from a half-mile away. At first we werent sure if the Pumpkin or the man was split open as the mess on the ground was extraordinary. Buckhalter was knocked out for a few days but we expect him to make a full recovery in a few more weeks. |
Author: | Scott Ludwig [ Fri Nov 19, 2010 9:49 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Miss Use of Pumpkins |
Hmmm rotten pumpkin stew...now that's a new one to try! ![]() ![]() |
Author: | GCDavey [ Sat Nov 20, 2010 2:26 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Miss Use of Pumpkins |
<Salute> Suh Suh in order to shed some clarity on the regrettable "Pumpkin Episode" I must report the following. The pumpkins were indeed capture by members of the AotM, we proceeded to question said pumpkins in regard to troop movement and strength, the pumpkins refused to talk. I personally Suh spent considerable time with the Senior Pumpkin imploring him to give up what he new. Alas Suh that pumpkin would not crack, it was deemed then that the only way to retrieve the information we sought was to make an example of some of the pumpkins. While I don't condone what happened next the men and I had been under alot of stress and dammit Suh the pumpkins were mocking us. It is regrettable Suh what happened next, but Suh I see that we had no other option. It was horrible Suh there was Pumpkin everywhere.....those little suckers sure go off with a bang when fired out of a Howitzer hehehehe excuse me my apologies Suh. Oh I need a drink Suh <Salute> All is not lost though Suh, I have just heard from my command that my boys have manged to capture more Yankee sympathizers, 2 chickens and a sack of spuds. |
Author: | Blake [ Sat Nov 20, 2010 3:45 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Miss Use of Pumpkins |
More spuds?! Dont forget the "Great Spud" episode of last summer. They have ears. |
Author: | sstiles [ Sun Nov 21, 2010 6:17 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Miss Use of Pumpkins |
General McOmish Sir I guess the admission from Gen Strickler closes this matter. What else can we do with 50,000 "liquidised" pumpkins? Ah, maybe we can ferment them! How about pumpkin juleps Sir? Then there is pumpkin vodka, pumpkin wine - the mind boggles. |
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