Napoleonic Wargame Club (NWC)
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Haitian General spotted
https://www.wargame.ch/board/nwc/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=12595		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Al Amos [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 5:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Haitian General spotted
Recently a photo was obtained of a certain Haitian General observing his army's training.

Image

Russian intelligence reports that Haitian officers often lead their men into battle riding backwards. We believe it is for the two following reasons:

a) To see if anyone is following.

b) Reduces number of fracticide incidents. Apparently, all friendly fire injuries were sustained in the back when the injured wasn't looking. A very high number of officers have been lost in this manner in the Haitian army resulting in the above practice.
Author:  MCJones1810 [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
How utterly clever. The Haitian General is obviously in the service of France judging by the manner in which he is mounted. French cavalrymen often believe themselves to be invisible when mounted 'rear saddle'. :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

I might add that is a very nice horse, though. No doubt 'borrowed' from their Saxon allies just like they 'borrow' everything else. :wink: :wink: :wink:
Author:  John Corbin [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Ok, this is to darn funny.

I am in vacation now in China and sitting at a local Starbucks when I saw this. I spewed coffee all over myself when I could not hold my laughter in :D

Thanks guys :P
Author:  MCJones1810 [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Hey, John! We miss you, buddy! :cry: :cry: :cry:

When are you coming home? :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Seriously, how are you??? :? :? :?
Author:  Gary Whalen [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
It is pretty funny, I totally cracked up while I was at work when I saw this lol!! Thanks for the laugh
:D



Mark your comments are most enjoyable. France 'borrowing' something, no!?!?
:wink:
Author:  MCJones1810 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:00 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
There is yet another practical reason why French officers ride facing to the rear. That way, when they are fleeing the fight, they get shot from the front. It makes it look like they died a glorious death, or actually suffered a valiant wound. It also increases the odds of medal awards and/or promotions (assuming they survive of course!). :wink: :wink: :wink:

Uh-oh, now I have done it. The Grim Peacock of France will no doubt march into this forum now and kindly offer to tear me limb from limb. It wouldn’t surprise me if his most formidable commanding officer accompanies him on the mission either. Of course, both of them will probably laugh their butts off in private before they enter this tavern. It is just when facing me that they will be of particularly stern countenance. That’s OK, I have a defense in mind. “…but Al started it!” (Accompanied by the appropriate quivering lip and teary eyes of utter sincerity of course.) :cry: :cry: :cry:

What are they going to do to you, Al. Last I heard you were fighting all of them at the same time anyway! :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:
Author:  clifton seeney [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:06 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Russi Caverly Training program with Al in the center :P :P :lol: Image
Author:  Colin Knox [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:47 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
[quote="MCJones1810"]There is yet another practical reason why French officers ride facing to the rear. That way, when they are fleeing the fight, they get shot from the front. It makes it look like they died a glorious death, or actually suffered a valiant wound. It also increases the odds of medal awards and/or promotions (assuming they survive of course!). :wink: :wink: :wink: [quote]


Actually we French are such fine horsemen we have taught our horses to run backwards towards the enemy. Thus while we swing our swords cutting the allied rabble to pieces our horses can fire crap at your officers :mrgreen: You will note in this picture of Colonel Dumas the horse is about to explode a fart in the general direction of the coalition. This takes a great deal of training and patience to achieve this level of harmony with your mount :lol:
:mrgreen:
Author:  Aloysius Kling Sr [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 6:32 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Quote:
Actually we French are such fine horsemen we have taught our horses to run backwards towards the enemy. Thus while we swing our swords cutting the allied rabble to pieces our horses can fire crap at your officers :mrgreen: You will note in this picture of Colonel Dumas the horse is about to explode a fart in the general direction of the coalition. This takes a great deal of training and patience to achieve this level of harmony with your mount :lol:
:mrgreen:________________General Knox


All I can say is: "Nice One"
Author:  Jeff Bardon [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 6:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
A grognard in the service of France approaches with "a particularly stern countenance."

"I don't know about limb tearing, but if Colin wishes some help in that regard, that's fine with me. Oh, and while Al's was funny, I liked Cliff's better." :lol: :lol: :lol:
Author:  Kosyanenko [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 8:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Take part in ACTION HOT WINTER 1812!!! NOW or NEVER!!! Only for Haitian generals and officers!!! Collect 5 cut off french generals heads and get a chance to receive a FUR COAT!!!
Author:  MCJones1810 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Well, Cliff, I have to say most excellent work, sir! :P :P :P

I sure would hate to be Al in the exercise! If that horse misses his timing in the least or, God forbid, stumbles in some manner, poor Al is surely in a mess!! :oops: :oops: :oops:

I think the photo well illustrates the point of what can realistically be achieved when copious quantities of Vodka are imbibed. :wink: :wink: :wink:

And regarding the dastardly methods of Modern Warfare alluded to by General Knox, perhaps all nations should convene in a neutral setting to discuss the matter of the restriction of gas attacks on opposing forces. Might I suggest Geneva as a possible location? I hear it is truly breathtaking at this time of year! :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

And I do have one question about Anton's contest. Do five of those notable trophies actually garner one a fine, new Russian fur coat, or simply a number of raffle tickets for the drawing? :D :D :D
Author:  Ed Blackburn [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 3:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Colin Knox wrote:
MCJones1810 wrote:
There is yet another practical reason why French officers ride facing to the rear. That way, when they are fleeing the fight, they get shot from the front. It makes it look like they died a glorious death, or actually suffered a valiant wound. It also increases the odds of medal awards and/or promotions (assuming they survive of course!). :wink: :wink: :wink:
Quote:


Actually we French are such fine horsemen we have taught our horses to run backwards towards the enemy. Thus while we swing our swords cutting the allied rabble to pieces our horses can fire crap at your officers :mrgreen: You will note in this picture of Colonel Dumas the horse is about to explode a fart in the general direction of the coalition. This takes a great deal of training and patience to achieve this level of harmony with your mount :lol:
:mrgreen:



Uh, if the horse fires crap while riding in this direction doesn't it blow back on the French Officer? Just sayin Colin... :roll:
Author:  Aloysius Kling Sr [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 3:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Blow back could never happen to a French officer, Horse Cr.. seems to be attracted to Russians, Prussians, Austrians, Englishmen and especially Hanoverians.

And we really need a new post, this is getting old fast!
Author:  Al Amos [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 4:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Haitian General spotted
Clifton,

Oh no that's not cavalry training!

That's the Movitational Seminar given by the NWC Russian army. Those members of the Russian army who have 10 Major Losses or more (and mutliples there of) are 'invited' to attend. The goal is to motivate the player to improve his play. I don't remember the names of everyone in the photo, I was a bit pre-occupied for some reason ;-), but I'm glad Anton didn't fall off his horse!

I'm told when a player has 50 Major Defeats Anton changes his mount to this guy:

Image

Btw, does anyone know how high a Brahama Bull can jump?
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