American Civil War Game Club (ACWGC)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slQ6jCJvYBo&feature=related

Juicing things up in here, boys! I'm looking for McOmish!

WHERE ARE YOU, McOMISH?

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General Jos. C. Meyer, ACWGC
Union Army Chief of Staff
Commander, Army of the Shenandoah
Commander, Army of the Tennessee
(2011-2014 UA CoA/GinC)

McOmish? Someone check under the bar again!

Alright, McOmish, come on in here and face me like a man! Its better to do it all here than in those Eastern Theater snoozefests! Besides, it'll give those places a break from your unslakable thirst, and you spend far too much time away from your own people!

Now here's the thing.

First I happen to have a little problem with my horse, and you go right on rushing into the Old Abe Tavern with Bob Weir and crew and proceed to drink the place dry, giving it a good going over in my absence!

I suppose that you felt it was the right thing to do at the time, but we Yankee dudes have also been recently pilloried for our reluctance to allow you Reb dudes to post in our forums! "Oh, they won't let us in their forums!" Strickler and his cohorts shout out! "The Yankees have acquired a phobia over their forum security; they are horribly palsied by their own insecurities," they bemoan.

At this point I could say, "See what happens when we allow Rebel dudes to post in our forums! See what happens when we courteously open our tavern doors to the 'Gentlemen of the South?' See what advantage they take of our hospitality?" But I won't say that. No, I'll not have it said that the AotT's Old Abe Tavern will turn away any thirsty officer of the ACWGC!

(Speaking of which I'll have a couple of beer tankards and a whiskey chaser!)

What should I say, instead, that would put an end to this unfair business? What could I possibly do to quiet this unreasonable prattling and dispell this notion that Rebel officers are unwelcome in Yankee drinking establishments? The answer, sir, is obvious.

JUST LOOK AT YOURSELF!

Look at the horrible condition you have put yourself in! Look at how those liquor stains on the chest of your uniform coat have bleached it into looking like your wearing a dirty white bib? Look at the scraggly, unshaven bush that you call a beard! And where is your hat, sir? I'll tell you were it is: sitting crumpled under the barshelf of the old Abe Tavern where you forgot it! Look at you, sir!

Your sword, sir! Where is it? I'll tell you again! Its sticking out of the rafters of the ceiling in the Old Abe Tavern! And your sidearm, sir, look at it! Its missing a hammer! What do you suppose happen to it? I'll tell you, again! You broke it off cracking walnut shells in the Old Abe Tavern! Look at you, sir!

And your boots...look at your boots! They are no longer distinguishable as to their correct side! You have so often pulled them back on to the wrong feet after awakening from your drunken stupors that they are now completely misshappen! Look at the sleeves of your uniform coat, sir! The topsides are grotesquely shiny from all of the foam you've wiped from your lips! And must I call attention to that far away, besodden look in your eyes? Admit it, sir, you were barely able to stumble in here, having no real sense of where you are and no real care for the sordid example you set for all of the officers of your command!

You have become a pathetic, horrible representation of an officer of the ACWGC CSA! And I salute you, sir, for your very unique and exemplary accomplishment! For you, and you alone, have achieved that which all other Rebel officers have apparently failed to do; that is, make posting within a Yankee tavern! Yes, what you have done, sir, goes far beyond any poor, spoken remonstration I might be able to make in this regard. You are the living proof of Southern persistence and ingenuity. You have dispensed with the unbecoming moanings and complaints of your peers and have actually done that one thing they could not have accomplished.

YOU ACTUALLY MADE POST IN A YANKEE TAVERN!

Look at you, standing there with your head so wobbly and your gaze uncertain, a shining example of what a real tavern raider is all about! And were I you, sir, I would hurriedly excuse myself before those who have been exposed for their hypocrisy should grab you and hide you from us! But before you and I each take his leave, I want to congratulate you and shake your hand for the wonderful job you have done. I salute you again! Here, have this seegar with my compliments!

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General Jos. C. Meyer, ACWGC
Union Army Chief of Staff
Commander, Army of the Shenandoah
Commander, Army of the Tennessee
(2011-2014 UA CoA/GinC)

Very amusing I must admit!

All I know is that to visit the MDT requires going to one website. To visit the multiple Union sites requires numerous trips, passwords, registrations, verification codes ect.

I shall now brave the entire process and give my Army members a taste of what it will take to particpate in the Union forums. Step by step we shall muddle through it together. Anyone who cares to follow in my wake please do so. Everyone pair up with a buddy so we don't all get lost in the labyrinth of Yankee traps, pitfalls, admin, and website errors.

How easy is it to access the MDT and post things? Let us first review the steps:
(to begin EVERY member is registered at the MDT upon graduation making them ALL immediately and painlessly available to participate here)
1. To post this I sat at my comp and hit the "MDT" link I have.
2. I clicked on this thread and hit reply.

Two steps.

Okay, God help me, I am off to invade the Yankee taverns!

First, the Army of the Tennessee!
Now let me go post in the Old Abe Tavern.

1. I go to the Club homepage
2. I click on Link Express (thats my first guess to find the tavern)
3. I clicked on the link to the Forums listed on the Link Express.
4. I then tried to post but was told I could not do so without authorization (BRICKWALL)
5. I then found registration procedures and clicked on it.
6. I then read a multi-step procedure to gain admittance to the Forum.

Now I add more steps to this procedure:
7. I follow step one outlined by the admin of the Eagle's Perch
8. I filled out all the required information
9. I misread the confirmation code - did it over again
10. Succeeded and an email was sent to the admin
11. I now must email Joe Meyer and relate the information to him personally (add a few more steps here for everyone to go to their email account and email him)
12. It is a waiting game as I now await confirmation.
13. I write down my selected username and password and add it to the list I know I should start keeping

Next stop - Army of the Potomac!

1. I visit the Link Express again
2. I find the Forums for this Army are all private.

Moving west to the Army of the Shenandoah!

1. I visit the Link Express
2. I find the Forums for this Army are all private.

Lastly the Army of the Cumberland!

1. I visit the Link Express website
2. This takes me to the AotC website where there is, finally!, an open forum!
3. Wait! I must first register, yet again
4. I click on the register link on the top of the site
5. I then agree to the terms and state I am over the age of... thirteen? I could make a crude joke but will pass.
6. I fill out another registration form
7. I submit the form
8. I await confirmation by the admin to post on their site

Isn't there a second Injun Tavern somewhere? Ah, yes, why not add some more lunacy and go hunt up the secondary tavern created this last week.

How do I find it? I know the link is posted in a thread somewhere but lets assume I dont know that.

1. I go to the Link.... wait... I did that and it didnt work the first time.
2. I go to the Union Headquarters link to try there
3. Success! On the bottom of the page is a link to the Union Army Forums!
4. I click on the Wooden Injun Tavern on the bottom of the page and am directed to the second Injun Tavern
5. Here there is "The Bar" so I clicked on it
6. I then made a posting and entered a verifcation number
7. HUZZAH! I have made a posting!

Now, isnt there a general Yankee ran forum somewhere?

HUZZAH! Indeed there is! This can also be posted on by entering a username and verification code with every post.


In summary - are you kidding me! I have taken Geometry tests that have taken less time than this. Total time writing this and searching - 20 minutes! And I navigate the Club sites with the best of them. For a novice at finding things around here this process could be a nightmare!

In the end I await confirmation from two Army sites, two are private only, but the main Union site is, indeed, open.

The goal should be to make things easier for everyone to find and participate in. To me this process just seems overly complicated. Maybe that could be why in the time I have been in the Club I have never seen one of the fabled "Tavern Raids." We hear of them only in whispers from the aged veterans but I have yet to see any in reality.

Now I could organize one on the AotT site but I would have to guide my guys through the process of registering there and you would have to accept their registrations. Could we make it any more obvious we were coming? Why not just give you the time and date of the raid so you can iron the curtains and have a cake baked for us? No, that would be borderline absurd. Why ask my guys to go through so many steps just to post something on a different site when they have such easy and ready access to this main club site?

I am sure the above comments will prompt some Union officer to organize a raid on this tavern just to shut me up. I welcome such a thing, sir! Bring forth your legions - if you can even find them - and do your worst on this Tavern! A one-man "raid" is not worthy of the name "raid." Bring a half dozen or so men with you and then we will call it a bonafide "raid." But my Army will move swiftly to avenge such a thing!

Well - as swiftly as following the above thirteen steps to post on the Eagle Perch will allow. Oh, and waiting the necessary 24 hours and receiving verifcation from yourself will permit.

Or you could just place an open tavern here and our two armies could pound the living stuffing out of one another in the taverns with total ease.

That is, unless the poor AotT just can't handle it....

Blake,

You must have some magic key that allows you to post within the MDT without logging on! I cannot make any posts until I do such, as I've just done now after coming back. How is this done?

Joe

_________________
General Jos. C. Meyer, ACWGC
Union Army Chief of Staff
Commander, Army of the Shenandoah
Commander, Army of the Tennessee
(2011-2014 UA CoA/GinC)

I know that was meant sarcastically but in all honesty all you have to do is check the box "Log me in automatically each visit" on the login screen and you never need to use your PW or ID to visit the MDT

I have done that, but it has never worked for me; once again demonstrating the built-in bias towards Union officers! How is this all possible?

Do you keep yourself online and logged in all the while you are at your computer, even if you go somewhere else on the internet?

_________________
General Jos. C. Meyer, ACWGC
Union Army Chief of Staff
Commander, Army of the Shenandoah
Commander, Army of the Tennessee
(2011-2014 UA CoA/GinC)

Yeah, I just have all the tabs on the top of IE set to the various websites I am using. Even when I am away at work I may still appear as "here" since I am logged in.

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General Weir,

You are a true gentleman and a scholar, sir, one whom I greatly admire for the company that he keeps! I shouldn't wonder that we would all agree that there is nothing that a few raised glasses and good cheer could not accomplish, except perhaps the rehabilitation of your Western Theater Commander! Were that to happen, I suppose this war would lose some of its best tainted lustre; so perhaps we should all drink to his continued, besmirched and unadulterated slide into inebriated brilliance.

Say, this is not bad stuff you've got here! May I ask from where you stock it?

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General Jos. C. Meyer, ACWGC
Union Army Chief of Staff
Commander, Army of the Shenandoah
Commander, Army of the Tennessee
(2011-2014 UA CoA/GinC)

Generals Meyer and Weir I want to assure you that my long slow spiral into drunken depravity is in fact a controlled long slow spiral and it is all part of my master plan to drink the Union dry (I am half way there). Once the Union is dry then there will be rioting in the streets, failed marriages, incontinence on a continental scale and all round depression - And then the union will crumble, as such a rotting edifice surely should (queue evil laugh) ha ha ha ha ha ha

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General Cam McOmish

Brigade Commander
Alabama State Volunteers
Cleburne's Division
Hardee's Corps
(1/1/1)
Army of Tennessee
Confederate States of America

You think he's joking... but he's not...

"Say, this is not bad stuff you've got here! May I ask from where you stock it?"

Why General Meyer, the Army of Potomac keeps my command in all the sprits we can afford to load up and haul away, if memory serves this vintage was gathered at Manassas Junction. Speaking of which I may still have some tins of excellent lobster salad out in my saddle bag, if we can round up some saltine crackers I think we would have the makings of a tasty snack.

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General Weir,

The Potomac boys, you say? Well they've been known to overindulge themselves from time to time, always getting the best equipment and supplies and sort of getting used to being first in line for everything; so I'm not surprised that you're able to scoop up what they drop.

As it so happens my aide, Captain Sweeny, who's with my escort outside, just received a fresh box of saltines, the real article, from his relatives there in Chicago, and I'm sure he'll see fit to surrender them for a drink or two. Then we can, perhaps, indulge ourselves in that snack while McOmish seeks out a good bath and shave. I've been meaning to sit down with you anyway and talk about a joint effort in cooking up some more ACWGC specific awards.

Say, did I ever tell you about the time my top sergeant of the Headquarters Guard got himself into trouble with the Michigan Women's Sanitation Commisson? It was quite an embarassment for the entire command at the time, but we were able to calm everything down with that new-fangled paternity test advertised by Dr. Norton Whipple of New York and proved the rather dubious character of the alleged victim. That's right, you may recall what was called "The Red Drawers Affair!"

Ah, here are the crackers!

Here's how it all started. Sergeant Buckmaster had been detailed as the ladies' liaison with Headquarters, and he was not one to take his duties flippantly. There was no one more dependable nor trustworthy than that wily, old veteran; and he relished the opportunity of being able to converse "wit the wimon" on a regular basis. Little did he know that their own supervisor, Head Matron Margaret Hinkle, was a closeted nymphomaniac! That's right, why the woman was later said to have...

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General Jos. C. Meyer, ACWGC
Union Army Chief of Staff
Commander, Army of the Shenandoah
Commander, Army of the Tennessee
(2011-2014 UA CoA/GinC)

I'm so glad I'm a member of this club...you guys are nuts.

<salute>

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Brig. Gen. Nick DeStefano
5th Artillery Battalion, 2nd Division, II "Wolf-Pack" Corps, AotM
[img]http://www.acwgc.org/IVCorps/Image/IVCorps250.png[/img]