Major de Pecqueur
Your enthusiasm is commendable Sir! Maybe the AotM will stand us a round of drinks as reward.
The are a good bunch of fellows here Sir - I guess you could say that they are the comedy act of the CSA Army. They have fun and certainly know how to fight as well. They are also known to enjoy a drink or two - I guess that is when Gen Strickler dreams up these fantasies. Don't take General Strickler too seriously with these comments about paternity cases. He has a vivid imagination.
Did I tell you about the time that Gen Strickler and Gen McOmish went on an undercover operation to Washington?
Well it all started when they joined Spalding and Rogers' Circus:

General Strickler took a shine to the trapeze artists and learned all about flying high - think he even started the Mile High Club whilst he was there:

As for General McOmish he was wanting something much more in keeping with his title of the "Lion of the West":

There was unfortunately a problem when he lighted his seegar whilst imbibing that horrible Northern fire-water!

But that was nothing compared to what happened after General Strickler met Nora the tattooed lady (by the way I have it on good authority that she is related to a top Yank general):

Anyway they were at a performance of the Spalding and Rogers' Circus ready to perform their acts when they discovered that the whole Yank Army HQ was going to be attending - Brig Gens, Maj Gens, Lt Gens, Gens & even the General in Chief! It was even rumoured that Old Abe might attend. Here was a chance to end the war all at once! Ah here they come now - Generals Strickler & McOmish join us for a drink - nice Muster by the way. Please do tell us about the great circus debacle.