Bill Peters wrote:
So easily you trade superior knowledge. I will be happy to bleed Colin dry once we both get time to rendezvous at Dennewitz ... I will match my superior knowledge against his superior perfume any day!
I suppose if General Knox had actually sent me the French password, I would have been honor bound to reciprocate but, in truth, I was certain that would never occur. I suspect that the good English Field Marshall is correct about the conversations in Pierre's Tavern in any case.
I am, however, certain that there are no salad forks in Pierre's Tavern. No doubt the hapless French officers residing within are forced to eat their snails, slugs, and whatever other sundry mollusks they can find with nothing but their fingers. Why just the other day, as I was finishing a meal, I set my empty plate and fork aside, coincidentally placing it closer to a senior French officer who was having a conversation at the next table over. Noticing my actions, the Frenchman casually glanced over and spied the discarded utensil. His gaze immediately locked upon the fork and I watched with the very deepest amusement as he began to sweat and tremble, the color completely draining away from his visage. Never taking his eyes off the fork, he tried to speak, and with the greatest difficulty did finally manage to utter but a single word. "N....N....Ne....Ne..........Nelms!" was all he could say before the stress became too great for his delicate constitution. To my sheer delight, the poor Frenchmen fainted dead away. Fortunately for him, two of his comrades caught him before he fell and cracked his skull on the hard, tavern floor. They quickly whisked him outside where he could recover in the fresh, cool air, both of them casting worried glances at my discarded plate and the offensive utensil still resting upon it. In truth, I believe they were as relieved to distance themselves from the device as they were concerned for their friend's well being. In essence, a mere salad fork caused all three to execute the most common of French tactics, to turn tail and run.
