Colonial Campaigns Club (CCC)

Mr. McClellan, I insist on nothing but an apology from Mr. Amos. I too am embroiled in several extended militry matters, but can squeeze your demise in if YOU insist. If you chime in, as Mr. Amos did, expect to receive suitable recourse. Gentlemen, I am at your disposal.

<center><font color=gold> Brigadier General Sir Phil Natta Esq. KB</font id=gold></center>[url="http://www.angelfire.com/mo3/cccbritisharmy/FootGuards.htm"]<center><font color=red>HM First Foot Guards</font id=red></center>[/url]<center>No Quarter!</center>

Gen'l Natta, I am willing to wait and see if Lt Col Amos and Ens. Hopper wish to deal with you themselves. Rest assured though that we will meet again, and I give you a fight that you will long remember.

Ensign Gary McClellan
12th Virgina Light Dragoons
CO, Northern Department

Phil, if you need a second in this one, it would be my honor. Let's teach them some manners (not that I would hope it will stick). <img src=icon_smile_evil.gif border=0 align=middle>

<font color=gold>Lt.Col. D.S. Walter O.S.M.
Commanding 4th Regiment of Foot, "The King's Own"
Aide-de-camp, Royal North American Corps</font id=gold>

"Sir Natta, I am only sorry that my horse looks better in a wig than thee!"

"A courier will be on his way, wearing rain gear should you decide to throw beverages on him as well."

[Returning his sabre to its scabbard, Lt. Col. Amos turns to Ensign Hopper.]

"Ensign Hopper, I will deal with this, [clears throat] man. Go get your uniform cleaned."

"You will find enough money at Ft. George to pay for it, and as I suppose Lt. Col. Walter will be dispatched to assist in the transfer of funds, you will find it an enjoyable meeting indeed <img src=icon_smile.gif border=0 align=middle>."

[Lt. Col. Amos draws near to Ensign Hopper, softening his voice he continues.]

"Take it easy on him son, the Lt. Col. has grown softer with age and rank <img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>."

Lt. Col. Al Amos
1st U.S. Dragoons 1812-R

Mr. Amos sir...after you've consoled Master Hopper, dried his coat and his tears with your tattered sleeve, and sent him back to his sergeant mother, then we may be able to come to terms with our own disagreement. You see old boy I was not making light of his advancement in rank, but rather his er, unfortunate choice of words concerning "detestable Rebcoated ones and their Hessian lapdogs" and other sundry insults directed at His Majesty's gentlemen soldiers. Bad enough that we must tolerate the crude and undignified habits of you provincials, but we will not suffer such scandalous insults, particularly from a "fresh from the farm" ensign. Should Master Hopper, and Mr. McClellan, care to add their weight to your side of the dispute by means of arms, then be assured that the First Foot Guards will deal with them in a singularly harsh manner, which will be much worse than a gentlemanly applied drink to the face.

But the unsettled matter of placing your weapon upon my person without due apology is noted sir. Let our officers draw up arrangements for our forces to meet then, as personal duelling has (to the detriment of my pocketbook) recently been forbidden by Lord Cornwallis.

I remain (in your case Mr. Amos, not so humble nor obediently) at your service. Good day to you sir.

Thank you for your gracious offer of seconding my position Lt. Colonel Walter. These chaps simply know not what they do.

<center><font color=gold> Brigadier General Sir Phil Natta Esq. KB</font id=gold></center>[url="http://www.angelfire.com/mo3/cccbritisharmy/FootGuards.htm"]<center><font color=red>HM First Foot Guards</font id=red></center>[/url]<center><img src="http://us.f1.yahoofs.com/users/b3df3682/bc/1776/footflg4.gif?bc3b6F9Ajy932yH0" border=0></center>

"Ah... Now I see, Sir Natta. So you were objecting to Mr. Hopper's use of the phrase 'detestable Rebcoated ones'."

"Yes that was quite an unfortunate choice of words. I believe ...<b>despicable</b> Red-coated ones... would have been much more accurate."

"The plans for your next defeat are being drawn up as we speak. Now be a good fellow and have Lt. Col. Walter at Ft. George with a full purse to attend to Mr. Hopper's repair."

"Thank you and carry on."

Lt. Col. Al Amos
1st U.S. Dragoons 1812-R

Edited by - Al Amos on 05/07/2002 21:19:19

Wow! Sir Natta! You seem to have gotten these rabble in a lather! Of course, they never bathe so a LATHER is very new to them. You would think with the FRENCH helping them, that they at least would have the common decency to use COLOGNE!<img src=icon_smile.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_big.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_cool.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_shock.gif border=0 align=middle><img src=icon_smile_dissapprove.gif border=0 align=middle> French and help used together with Colonials is an OXYMORON, anyway.

Well, if you have need of a second (and it appears you have it well under control) send a courier to my tent. I have to go now and make sure my batman powders my wig properly. I so detest it when he puts too much powder on it.

<img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>

<b><font color=gold>Ernie Sands
Col, 3rd East Kent,CCC
President, Colonial Camp Club
Col,1 Konig,VIII,AdR
BG,CO XXIII Corps AoO
Sch,183Inf,VIII,PzC
Pvt B Co, 3/3-MBC </b></font id=gold>

"Hmmm... seems we have a bit of a line forming up."

"Well then, we must keep them happy."

"Mr. McClellen, sir! Would you be so kind to escort Mr. Sands back to New Orleans. It appears he thinks he's Batman, so I think the Louisiana bayous will be a fitting home for him."

"Thank you sir."

"Okay any other lackeys of Fat George needing some 'special' attention? Come, come now don't be shy. This is a bar fight and I am sure we can find a partner for everyone."

"Of course if you prefer to hide behind the Powder Wig Smoke Screen being put up by Sir Natta and Mr. Sands, we understand."

"Fat George would be fit to be tied if too many of his school boys and their pet puppies got their Jackets and Knickers torn or dirty."

Lt. Col. Al Amos
1st U.S. Dragoons 1812-R

(All the patrons look up in horror at this outrageous and disgusting behavior demonstrated by our English cousins. Americans begin to strip down for action; the redcoats nervously look towards the door since they out number the Americans only three to one. Not good odds for them. With the watered down (for the English inability to hold adult beverages) beer dripping from his face, the new Ensign coolly surveys the powdered and wigged one before him. A smile breaks upon his face as he replies:

“Young Master Natta and Company! We rough and tumble "hunting shirts and rifle" types of which you disparage, generally end up our parties in a nice friendly round of fist-a-cuffs just for the heck of it anyway! After all, what is a good tussel among friends! I have been in many a scrape before, and will be again. I have taken my share of lickings and dished out quite a few as well. So challenges and brawls are nothing new to me! In fact, I enjoy nothing more than a no holds barred brawl! I have learned through the years that insults are a mere pittance, especially coming from a Fop, and not worth noticing. It takes more than disparaging remarks concerning my parentage to rile me up! However, how dare you throw good (if watered down) BEER away! Some things simply cannot be overlooked. Col Amos and Ensign McCellan, I appreciate your back up in this brawl and if you wish to keep those young Masters occupied till I can arrange to meet them, I would be much obliged.â€

"That's the spirit!"

"Take no prisoners! Give no quarter!"

"Although if you can grab a few shillings from these guys, we'll need the funds to clean the place."

"Mingoe! I'll catch 'em you scalp 'em. Deal?"

"Here we go boys don't choke on their powder."

[With that Lt. Col. Amos lunges into a group of quivering King's men!]

Lt. Col. Al Amos
1st U.S. Dragoons 1812-R

Ah, Col. Amos, I see you are now insulting the entire British Army as well as our good King. I have my men of the 52nd mustering as we speak, I consider it an honor to form ranks with the distinguish officers as the likes as Col. Sands and Brig. Gen. Natta, if they would have me of course. Bring more of your rabble lot you call an "Army" so we may settle this issues.

Lieutenant Kenny O’Leary
52nd Oxfordshire
2nd Corps 4th Div.
Center Wing British Army

Welcome young O'Leary, but please leave your mother's cow outside, no need for a fire to break out <img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>.

(Sorry, couldn't resist <img src=icon_smile.gif border=0 align=middle>.)

Lt. Col. Al Amos
1st U.S. Dragoons 1812-R

Being insulted as paymaster (and having my name disfigured!) by a Yankee Rebel would-be officer who doesn't even need to shave yet is one thing (and I'll make him pay for it!), but not being numbered among the "distinguished officers" of His Majesty by someone wearing red, that really hurts ... young master Hopper, you may name the field on which your remains shall be buried, and for you, Lt. O'Leary, it's pistols tomorrow at dawn, and you better pick someone who takes care of your valuables afterwards. <img src=icon_smile_evil.gif border=0 align=middle>

<font color=gold>Lt.Col. D.S. Walter O.S.M.
Commanding 4th Regiment of Foot, "The King's Own"
Aide-de-camp, Royal North American Corps</font id=gold>

No insult intended Col. Walter I assure you sir! Your career is as distinguished as any officer within our ranks. As a matter of fact the "distinguished" list of British officers would be quit long to list here. So put down your pistols and grab those fellows in blue over there and give a knee to the groin and an elbow to the jaw! oh.. by the way.... the cow thing..... never proven<img src=icon_smile_wink.gif border=0 align=middle>

Lieutenant Kenny O’Leary
52nd Oxfordshire
2nd Corps 4th Div.
Center Wing British Army

Well ... apology accepted, Sir. (Which reminds me, isn't there still a duel to be fought between Sir Phil and me, for an insult that happened last summer but was never settled?)
In this case, let's whip the Rebels instead.<img src=icon_smile_evil.gif border=0 align=middle>

<font color=gold>Lt.Col. D.S. Walter O.S.M.
Commanding 4th Regiment of Foot, "The King's Own"
Aide-de-camp, Royal North American Corps</font id=gold>